This post may contain affiliate links, which means that we make a small commission when you place orders using our links.
This post is sponsored by Athleta, a brand that made the most comfortably stretchy jeans I’ve owned. Shop my look on athleta.com.
Ever look down at your belly when sitting down or doing crunches, notice belly rolls, and roll your eyes in embarrassment?
Ever pass by a mirror and feel the impulse to lift your top and check on your abs (or absence of them)?
Ever go through photos of yourself and delete the ones where you don’t look “skinny”, wiping away evidence of your juicy thighs or belly?
I’ve been there. Here’s the thing: you can eat all the superfoods, drink all the celery juice and do all the yoga, but if you’re not doing it with the intention of nourishment and self-love and are avoiding reality… there’s no point.
Physical benefit from all these things is a fraction of their benefit when combined with the subtle energetic level, a.k.a. your thoughts and beliefs about who you are and what’s possible for you.
That’s why I started @breakfastcriminals. So that you can find self-care practices, rituals and recipes that help you get lit and present first thing in the morning.
But what if body positivity is not your thing? What if loving your body unconditionally seems to far off from reality?
The very powerful practices I’m about to share with you have significantly impacted my relationship with my body.
You can implement these 7 practical tools right away. I hope they will help you find a little more space for presence and acceptance, and maybe even self-love.
1. Clean up your social media feed
Ever feel ok about your body, and then start scrolling on Instagram, and suddenly everything about the way you look seems wrong? Traditional media and magazines are known to perpetuate body image issues and creating unrealistic standards for women, but so does social media.
Do you follow people whose appearances bring you down the rabbit hole of unrealistic comparison? Here’s the truth: you chose it. So if how thigns are isn’t working, choose something else that actually empowers you.
Here’s my recommendation: go and unfollow or “mute” any accounts that have ever made you feel bad about your body. Ready? Go. Report back in 7 days. I guarantee you that this simple conscious social media move will improve your life.
2. Clean up your wardrobe
Do you have any clothes in your closet that don’t make you feel like the best version of yourself? Get rid of them. Donate them, give them away – I don’t care. Just get them out of your space. Especially the secret pile of clothes that you’re saving for “when you lose weight”. I have been consistently getting rid of clothes that don’t bring me joy or don’t feel 100% great when I wear them, and it has doubled my confidence. If you’re being stopped by the fear of having nothing to wear – don’t fret, there are brilliant services out there that allow you to rent awesome, stylish and trendy clothes without owning them. Which means that you can change your size and style as often as you want!
Another piece of wardrobe optimization to improve your relationship with your body is to buy clothes that are stretchy. Ever since I got into stretchy jeans and leggings (ok, and yoga pants too which I wear at home!), getting into my mom jeans seems like a daunting task.
My latest obsession are the Athleta Sculptek Skinny Jeans, which in my experience withstand spontaneous headstands, biking, and even a Barre3 class. Yup, I was the weird person wearing jeans in a barre class, because I forgot my workout clothes.
And you know what? It worked perfectly. Since then, I’ve been wearing them to meditation, cacao ceremony and other workshops where you have to sit cross-legged for long periods of time. I have become convinced that they’re one of the most functional pairs of jeans I’ve ever owned.
3. Choose your thoughts carefully
Flexibility in your clothes is awesome. Flexibility in your mental state is even better.
There is more and more research that proves that our thoughts can affect our chemistry and our immunity. So next time you catch yourself judging your body or someone else’s, instead of trying to stop it, just be aware of it. Try on the idea that the thoughts coming up don’t belong to you – they’re just a broken record that needs to play out before it stops.
Know that this may not work immediately, but the more you practice awareness, the less of a grip you will have on associating yourself with these thoughts.
You are not your thoughts. Thoughts are not facts, so don’t believe everything you think.
To take it to the next level, you can even sit in a quiet place (or go into nature!) and talk back to that judgmental voice with kind acceptance, and ask it what it really wants from you.
4. Move your body how it feels good
Do you ever go to the gym to burn off calories from a meal? If so, how does it make you feel? Confident and present, or frantic and judgemental? I’ll let you decide for yourself.
When you move your body from a place of “lack”, it gives you more of the same. When you move your body from a place of appreciation, it gives you more of the same. So find forms of movement that make you actually feel good. And it doesn’t have to be anything intense – in fact, studies show that too much of exercise can’t be a good thing.
5. Celebrate the small things
It’s not about how you look, it’s about how you love. This line I read in a book about the psychology of eating was the single most transformative idea that impacted my relationship with my body. If you really allow it to sink in, it shifts your attention from being fixated on your body, into what you love and care about in the world.
This is known as “body neutrality”. While body positivity encourages you to love your body unconditionally, body neutrality invites you to shift your attention from your appearance to what your body is capable of.
Instead of trying to fix yourself, appreciate the things that you do have and are capable of doing, whether it’s something physical like being able to practice yoga, or emotional, like being able to express love or make someone laugh.
6. Practice intuitive eating
Food is supposed to be nourishment, but we so often make it our punishment. We spend more time counting calories and planning meals than listening to our bodies. When you listen to your body just a little bit more than your head… something magical happens. But how do you do it? Let me guide you through the intuitive eating process that I follow.
7. Practice Buddha Belly Breathing
Take deep “Buddha belly” breaths, expanding your belly as much as you comfortably can and then tightening your belly on an exhale. Breathe in on the count of 3 through your nose, breathe out on the count of 6 through your nose. Repeat 3 times. This simple breathing exercise will help you move your consciousness from your head into your body.
FINAL NOTE:
When we judge our body and compare ourselves to others, we’re completely out of touch with reality. Instead of trying to be someone who you’re not or look like someone else, trust that you are unique, perfectly imperfect and were given this exact body and this exact life experience for a reason. Aim for being the best version of YOU, instead of trying to achieve the “ideal body”, which doesn’t exist.